I went from not wanting any kids.... to having four.

The Lord has taught me countless truths through the last eight years, but recently He’s showing me there’s more He has for me.

There’s a greater shift in my thinking and my heart that He wants to do. Just as God is the perfect Father, He’s the perfect Mother, too. He wants to teach me how to be the perfect mother to my kids. How “perfect” I become depends on my level of surrender to the Holy Spirit.

Lord, come and bring revelation to me right now even as I write. Help me put to words what you’re teaching me - what you want me to know and what you want me to grow in.

One thing He revealed to me last weekend sticks out in my mind. It was at the Missional Family Conference at our base. The speaker said, “Don’t let your past hold you back.” It hit me for the first time, that subconsciously I’ve let my past of resisting motherhood initially effect my total surrender to it now. I always tell people my testimony about this in a way that rejoices in all God has done, but really there’s still more He wants to redeem and renew.

See, many people have the wrong idea (as I used to) that children hinder us from the calling God has for us. We miss the truth that children ARE the ministry. They are ONE OF THE GREASTEST CALLINGS anyone could ever have.* While not everyone will get married and have kids**, God will use all of us in His Kingdom because we are an intrigal part of His plan. Whether single or married, kids or not, it doesn’t change our effectiveness in the Kingdom. Our effectiveness is determined by our knowledge and obedience to the Father. (Matthew 7:21)

When it comes to ministering to children, there’s no more influencial role than that of Mom and Dad (grandparents as well.) And, as most of us know, children don’t stay young for long. The most influencial years we have with them are few. That’s one reason, when God told me to homeschool my children, I whole-heartedly agreed. It’s also the reason that even now I’m surrendering to the Lord ALL my hopes and dreams for these next 17 years of having my children in my home. My influence, choices, and treatment of my children will directly influence my children to follow the Lord or reject Him. As Karen Anderson said last weekend at the conference, “I couldn’t live with the idea of my children NOT knowing the Lord. It just wasn’t an option.” That’s why she prayed, and prayed, and prayed, for her children, as well as raised them with a biblical worldview. All six follow the Lord, as well as all their grandchildren. And that’s not because of “luck” -that’s purposeful waring in the spirit for their family daily!

So, I don’t know what God will have me do during these years of raising my children, but I’m willing for anything. As the worshippers at the International House of Prayer (where I’m at right now) just sang... “There’s no such thing as dangerous prayers. Your leadership is perfect and you’re a good, good Father.” I rest in that truth.

{A special note to any reading this who want children and yet no children have come, take courage. Keep interceding for a child. I myself am a miracle child who was prayed for for many years. Also, open your heart to adoption. It’s a beautiful picture of the Gospel. Ask God for more opportunities to parent children around you who need love. Know that you’re not alone!}

*{Throughout the bible, children are thought of as blessings from God, rewards, arrows, and a sign of prosperity. Women would fight over who could have the most kids! This is the opposite view of what many cultures have today, at least in the West and in China.}

**{The apostle Paul wrote about this in 1 Corinthians 7, specifically verses 25-28. Paul was single and wanted others to be that way because of how much time he could devote to the Lord. But, he says in verses 29-31 that it’s really about whole-heartedness to the Lord and not being in-love with the things of the world. Whether married or single, we need to all live with urgency knowing that Jesus is returning and we need to live like we only have our lifetime to share the Good News with the world! Remember, Paul thought Jesus WAS going to come back in his lifetime. Paul, though he didn’t have biological children, had many, many spiritual children. So also those who do not have children today can be spiritual parents to many who desperately need them.}